‘Fer the birds

High drama in the a.m. yesterday…

The kids discovered a bird sitting and shaking on our back patio.  He looked like a goldfinch, only a bit more brown.  So maybe a Colorado goldfinch?  (How do I know about ‘dem goldfinches?  I’m from New Jersey – where the Goldfinch is the state bird.  No, I am NOT bustin’ yer chops.  Me and my cousin Vinny know from state birds).

I suspected he ran into the sliding glass door, but from the look of the backwards foot & bright red eye on its right side, it had WAY more wrong than a run-in with the sliding glass door could account for.  And with the 90 degree heat beating down on him, he was fading fast.

To Sissy, the girl who wants to be a vet, this was the opportunity of a lifetime.  She sprang into action – poking holes in a shoebox, lining it with paper towels and adding a smidge of water in the lid of an old spaghetti jar for good measure.  The final step was hoisting the bird up-and-in but I insisted she put on some disposable craft gloves (beat THAT, Martha Stewart!!) to stand between her and a possible case of avian flu.

Mission accomplished and the hubby and kids flew out of the house (tee hee hee – pun intended.  Get it?  FLEW?!??  Beat THAT, Martha Stewart!!!)  on their way to the Bird Rescue.

Per the kids, the final report from Bird Rescue was:

  • The bird was a male, lesser goldfinch [interesting]
  • He had a head injury – most likely from running into in the patio door, thus the red eye and snaggle foot [bad]
  • There was a herd of MASSIVE squirrels (and a HUMONGO crow) on the Bird Rescue premises [Also bad.  Very bad.  I’m pretty sure I know where all of the birds “go” that don’t survive their head injuries.  And it’s NOT fed to the…uh…FISHES, New Jersey Style, if ya know what I mean wink, wink.]
  • I knew all of this already.  I didn’t need no stinkin’ Bird Rescue to tell ME what’s what!  [‘cept for that part about the squirrels.  And the crow.  That’s just weird.  But when you’re located in Colorado and lack for water – and “fishes” – you’s gotta get creative, if you’s know whadImean.]  That’s just a roundabout way of saying that I could TOTALLY get a job at Bird Rescue.  In fact, I’m going to put them down as one-of-my-5-requisite-job-resources which the Emergency Unemployment Office makes me note weekly.  [good!]

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