Every weird thing the dog eats comes out oddly intact from his other end.  Where…a LOT of times…it gets stuck.  Half in.  Half out.

The other day it was a piece of twine (which looked like a limp-noodle-secondary-tail hanging down underneath the dog’s bobbed-primary-tail).

While only four inches of the twine was visible to the naked eye, upon further investigation, it turns out the piece of twine was ACTUALLY 9 inches long (a total guesstimate, puh-lease!  I’m not THAT crazy!!).

The whole time the “twine extraction process” was underway, I could practically HEAR the circus music in the background.  I was playing the role of the clown pulling the never-ending silk scarf out of the…er…sleeve.  Duhn duhn duh duh duh duh DUHN duhn duh DUH!

During these instances when the clown is pulling the silk scarf out of the…er…sleeve, the dog always acts like the clown is actually trying to POKE IT BACK IN!  So he rears up (heh, heh, heh – pun intended), bats the clown with his front paws and in general acts like the clown was trying to take his maidenhood by force.  At the END (heh, heh, heh – ANOTHER intended pun – me funny), all embarrassed, the dog skulks away to another room.  Which is fine because the clown is skulking the other way – to dispose of whatever brackish seaweed has been extracted (NOT measure it, ya loons!).

So to get to the BOTTOM (funny) of things – you discover that what is really BEHIND (funny) all of this is that the dog has been a GREAT addition to the family.   ‘Cept for all that clownin’ around.

Yeah.  ‘Cept for that.  Let’s make no ifs, ands, or BUTTS [still funny] about THAT!