Sonny just got his braces off. While that was happening in the orthodontist\u2019s office, I ran to the grocery store to get his post-braces \u201cgift\u201d comprised of all the candy he couldn\u2019t eat (and claimed he didn\u2019t eat) while he had braces.<\/p>\n
Side note: not sure if he actually stayed away from things like\u00a0Starburst and Jolly Ranchers\u00a0for the duration since there were a lot of weird scenarios involving popped brackets and broken wires which started with the unbelievable, \u201cI was just standing on the playground when allofasudden my bracket popped off.\u201d Yeah, right.<\/em><\/p>\n The grocery store was a bit limited on containers to put the candy in so I opted for a slender lime green plastic pitcher. Something akin to a big beer mug from the L\u00f6wenbr\u00e4u tent at Octoberfest.\u00a0 Except lime green.\u00a0 And plastic.<\/p>\n When I presented the whole thing to Sonny in the car after he got his shiny new toofuses, he exclaimed, \u201cWow! This container looks like one of those Huge A$$ Beers from New Orleans!\u00a0 Remember those, Mom?!\u201d<\/p>\n No. Nope.\u00a0 Can\u2019t say as I do, and the more important question is how do YOU?!\u00a0 And did you just say the word a$$ right out here in the open?!\u00a0 <\/em>\u201cWhattcha talkin\u2019 about, Buddy?\u201d<\/p>\n Him: \u201cIn New Orleans, on Bourbon Street, all of the unprofessional bars were selling them. Don\u2019t you remember?\u00a0 They all had signs advertising Huge A$$ Beers.\u00a0 We didn\u2019t see those beers or signs at any of the professional ones.\u201d<\/p>\n Hmmm\u2026professional and unprofessional bars? Ok, I\u2019ll bite. <\/em>\u00a0\u201cWow.\u00a0 I\u2019m not sure what exactly an unprofessional bar is\u2026.?\u00a0 And also, you have to stop saying A$$.\u201d<\/p>\n Him: \u201cYou know, a professional bar is one where they have seats and you can go and sit down and maybe even order some food. The unprofessional ones were selling the Huge A$$ Beers and there was no place to sit and you just had to take your beer and go.\u00a0 They were pretty ratchet, those places.\u201d<\/p>\n What did I just say about saying A$$?! And it sounds like someone spied with their little eye lots of unprofessional\u2026bars on Bourbon Street and didn\u2019t say boo about it at the time.<\/em>\u00a0 \u201cAh, yes.\u00a0 Those are called storefronts or something.\u00a0 Where all you can buy are huge\u2026beers and then leave.\u00a0 I do remember those.\u00a0 They were pretty nasty.\u201d<\/p>\n