I\u2019m a do-er.\u00a0 Doin\u2019 things.\u00a0 Yeah, it keeps me busy.\u00a0 So busy I haven\u2019t had time to blog; What\u2019s it to ya?!<\/p>\n
(Jersey Girl will TELL you she\u2019ll cut you in the parking lot\u2026and then she\u2019ll CUT you in the parking lot.\u00a0 Do NOT piss Jersey Girl off.)<\/p>\n
Mostly I\u2019ve been busy buying a new car.\u00a0 Because when you only buy a new car once every thirteen years, it takes some time.<\/p>\n
First, I had to pray about it:<\/p>\n
\u201cOh, Lord, won\u2019t you buy me a Mercedes-Benz?\u00a0 My friends all drive Porches, I must make amends.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n Ha, ha, ha.\u00a0 That wasn\u2019t really me praying.\u00a0 That would\u2019ve been dumb.\u00a0 That was me singing about Janis Joplin praying.\u00a0 For a Mercedes-Benz.\u00a0 Which was also dumb, because look where it got her.<\/p>\n No.\u00a0 No Mercedes-Benz for me\u2026but originally I did really, really, REALLY want a BMW.\u00a0 That\u2019s Beemer to you.<\/p>\n But when I test drove the much desired Beemer?\u00a0 I was PISSED OFF!\u00a0 Ratchet.\u00a0 Beemer be total ratchet inside.\u00a0 Which was annoying as all get out because I was ready to fall in wuv, twew wuv with you BMW.\u00a0 But you blew it.\u00a0 Also?\u00a0 Beemer sales dude made us stand outside the whole time, no cozy chat around a rickety linoleum table for us.\u00a0 Nope, we stood beside the running car we had been test driving when dude\u2019s boss called him to tell him to come back.\u00a0 What the WHAT?!?\u00a0 Maybe he wasn\u2019t actually a salesperson?\u00a0 Maybe he was somebody\u2019s little brother back at the dealership who took us joyriding with him until he got \u201ccaught.\u201d\u00a0 This might explain why he had no marketing material to give us on the car because they were \u201call out\u201d of marketing material.\u00a0 Really??\u00a0 \u201cAll out\u201d of marketing material for a car that costs fifty large?!?\u00a0 Okey doke.\u00a0 Then I guess you can be all out of ME as a customer.<\/em><\/p>\n Next stop, Lexus.\u00a0 Which was slightly more impressive that Ratchet Town.\u00a0 Especially that part where, before they even show you the car, they walk you through their amazing state-of-the-art spaceship and point out the 100 year old billiards table and the fully stocked coffee bar and the 60 person private theater.\u00a0 Uhhh\u2026what does ANY of this have to do with cars?!?\u00a0 But if you had showed me where to get the free shots of Fireball?\u00a0 I would have been yours for life.\u00a0 Your bad.<\/em><\/p>\n Now, granted we were looking at more of a crossover and not at the big behemoth Lexus that costs more than my first house because A) I\u2019m morally opposed to buying cars that cost more than my first house, and B) The rear lift gate on the big behemoth Lexus was created using a total dingdong design.\u00a0 The rear lift gate \u2013 which opens to the SIDE instead of UP (like EVERY other rear lift gate on EVERY other car in the WORLD) \u2013 pretty much guarantees the rear lift gate will be sheared off the first time Sonny tries to put his baseball gear in the back.<\/p>\n So, no behemoth for us, but the interior of the crossover was very nice.\u00a0 Until I sat in the driver\u2019s seat and the ceiling knocked my sunglasses off my head.\u00a0 Oh?\u00a0 Wha\u2019up with that!?\u00a0 <\/em>And when 6\u20194\u201d Hubby sat in it after me, he looked like he was sitting in a Barbie jeep.\u00a0 Only short stuff goes in your Lexus, Lexus??\u00a0 <\/em><\/p>\n Anyway, Nosy Parker wants to know what we ended up with.\u00a0 Well I\u2019ll tell Nosy Parker who will be sure to tell you: we ended up with an Acura.\u00a0 Safety ratings blah, blah, blah.\u00a0 And it goes super-fast so the cops can\u2019t catch me when I\u2019ve had too much Fireball.\u00a0 Kidding.\u00a0 Totally kidding.\u00a0 Safety first.\u00a0 And the interior\u2019s nice\u2026and tall.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" I\u2019m a do-er.\u00a0 Doin\u2019 things.\u00a0 Yeah, it keeps me busy.\u00a0 So busy I haven\u2019t had time to blog; What\u2019s it to ya?! (Jersey Girl will TELL you she\u2019ll cut you in the parking lot\u2026and then she\u2019ll CUT you in the parking lot.\u00a0 Do NOT piss Jersey Girl off.) Mostly I\u2019ve been busy buying a new […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4343"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=4343"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4343\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4345,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4343\/revisions\/4345"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=4343"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=4343"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=4343"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}