{"id":3955,"date":"2014-11-12T12:27:03","date_gmt":"2014-11-12T19:27:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/?p=3955"},"modified":"2014-11-12T12:29:38","modified_gmt":"2014-11-12T19:29:38","slug":"accidental-donut","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/?p=3955","title":{"rendered":"Accidental Donut"},"content":{"rendered":"

If you think this is going to be a blog about what to do if a donut accidentally lands in your mouth, then you\u2019re sadly mistaken.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>That kindof stuff almost never happens to me.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>(Unless I throw a donut into my own mouth quick-as-lighting and then act surprised at how it got there.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Where on EARTH did that donut come from?!<\/span><\/em>)<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

No, no.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>THIS accidental donut story is not THAT accidental donut story.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>That story is at a different blog.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>You should probably go there if you are looking for tips on how to handle donuts that accidentally land in your mouth.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

THIS story is for those who read Garth Stein\u2019s \u201cThe Art of Racing in the Rain\u201d and know that dogs can talk, and also that your car goes where your eyes go.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>And sometimes your eyes?<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Are all googly like and you just want to go to a place where you can start over.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Let me explain:<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>It\u2019s been snowing for the last few days here in Colorado.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>And it\u2019s been like 2 degrees.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>And yes, I\u2019m so, so serious about the 2 degrees.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>I just checked the Weather Channel. <\/span><\/em>\u00a0<\/span>But life goes on despite the total crap weather, so the kids and I headed out a bit early this morning to get to school.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Oh, Hubby?!<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>He\u2019s on a business trip to Chicago.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Where they are actually having BETTER weather than Colorado.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Go figure.\u00a0<\/span><\/em>\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

The kids and I take the same route we always take, only slower.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>And as I\u2019m coming around a corner on a deserted street where there are no other tire tracks marring the newly fallen snow, the car goes into a complete 180\u1d52 spin.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Having read \u201cThe Art of Racing in the Rain\u201d myself, I\u2019m trying to get a lock on where exactly I want my car to go.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Not that curb.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Nope, not that curb either.<\/span><\/em>\u00a0 <\/span>I was very calm in the moment; there was no fear.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Turns out that what they say is true: everything slows down and seems to happen in a dream sequence.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Also?<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>The car has already been completely totaled, so I didn\u2019t really care WHAT happened to it.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>That wasn\u2019t even a factor.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>I just wanted to make sure the kids got out of the situation ok.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>And yes, the car has literally been totaled.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>It\u2019s another flippin\u2019 Colorado weather story having to do with volunteering at school and a massive hail storm.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>FLIPPIN\u2019 COLORADO WEATHER!!!<\/span><\/em>\u00a0 <\/span>It\u2019s then that I realized I just wanted to start that turn all over again.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>If I could just get\u2026back\u2026to where I started, it would all be ok.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>At which point Mr. Toad\u2019s Wild Ride reached its conclusion and the car came to a shuddering halt.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

And we WERE back.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>We were right EXACTLY back where I started the turn in the first place.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Well, except for that part about completely facing the opposite direction.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Huh.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>That\u2019s way weird.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>That dog in the book, Enzo, really knew what he was talking about.<\/span><\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

I turn to the kids in the back seat to make sure everyone\u2019s ok and I realize that weird clicking noises are coming out of Sonny\u2019s dry-as-dust throat.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>\u201cSweetheart?<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Are you hurt?<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Are you OK?!?\u201d<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

To which he replies, \u201cNow I\u2019m really worried about Dad\u2019s plane getting in today!\u201d<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t worry, Sweetie.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>I won\u2019t be driving it so I\u2019m sure it\u2019ll come in safely.\u201d<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Meanwhile, Sissy is sitting beside Sonny exclaiming, \u201cWOW!<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Was that a DONUT?!??<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>I think we just did a donut.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>WAS that a donut??!\u201d in the same voice one uses once they realize Bucket List business is happenin\u2019 \u2013 goin\u2019 down right here, right NOW.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Why yes.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Yes it was.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>It was a donut.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>I just did a donut.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Accidentally.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>An accidental donut.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

If you think this is going to be a blog about what to do if a donut accidentally lands in your mouth, then you\u2019re sadly mistaken.\u00a0 That kindof stuff almost never happens to me.\u00a0 (Unless I throw a donut into my own mouth quick-as-lighting and then act surprised at how it got there.\u00a0 Where on […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[305,306,303,302,304],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3955"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3955"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3955\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3963,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3955\/revisions\/3963"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3955"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3955"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3955"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}