Hey!\u00a0 Turns out there IS something worse than dealing with the unemployment compensation agency.\u00a0 And that “something” is going on a 3rd grade field trip to the Museum of Nature and Science.<\/p>\n
It all started last\u00a0night\u00a0when my son explained\u00a0to me that they got to pick their own field trip groups.\u00a0 And that he tried really hard to get some girls, but they were all “tooken” by the time it was his turn to pick.\u00a0 So his group of 5 was comprised of all boys.\u00a0 Or monkeys depending on how you look at it.\u00a0 But thanks for trying to get some feminine balance of power in there for me, Sweetie!<\/p>\n
Waaaaaay too much free time in the museum today.\u00a0 In between lunch and the planetarium show, it was just free-time.\u00a0\u00a0Hours and hours and HOURS of free time.<\/p>\n
And when we\u00a0have that much free time, we all tend to get anxious.\u00a0 Take the boy who stuck close to me and wasn’t as monkey-ish as the rest in the group.\u00a0 He was totally anxious about the time – all day long.\u00a0 Even after I had proven that I could get them where they needed to be, ON TIME!\u00a0\u00a0He just kept asking over and over, “is it time to go to the planetarium yet?”\u00a0 and “how much longer until we should head towards the planetarium?” or “how about the bus ride home?\u00a0 When do we need to\u00a0get\u00a0on the bus home??”<\/p>\n
Ugh!\u00a0 Enough with the questions about time.\u00a0 After about the 23rd one, we came to an understanding that in today’s play, I would star as the\u00a0chaperone who was totally keeping an eye on the time and he would play the part of the boy who was just having fun and enjoying himself on his field trip with his friends.\u00a0 There was a subtle nuance to his role in that he was ALSO playing the part of the boy\u00a0who was going to ask Santa for a watch for Christmas.<\/p>\n
And yes.\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 An\u00a08 year old boy’s nose WILL\u00a0bleed 15 minutes into the dinosaur exhibit especially if 1) getting to a bathroom means another 10 minute rush-walk out the other end of the exhibit 2) there are no tissues anywhere on God’s green earth or in the Museum of Nature and Science and 3) HE’S\u00a0BEEN PICKING HIS\u00a0NOSE ALL DAY!!!<\/p>\n
Perhaps HE was playing the role of the mummy embalmer (the boys grossed themselves out over in the ancient\u00a0Egypt Exhibit) who pulled brains out through noses?!\u00a0 And I’m not even going to mention the extraordinarily weird one-off conversation I had with the Ear-Nose-Throat doctor in that\u00a0same\u00a0mummification section who felt it was necessary to describe in\u00a0detail to me the way that he\u00a0worked (past tense since he’s retired naturally and now spending his days at the museum BOTHERING ME!!!) with neurosurgeons\u00a0\u00a0to remove pituitary glands.\u00a0 The description came with\u00a0“close talking” and overly descriptive finger pointing.<\/p>\n
Perhaps the\u00a0museum is actually located in another dimension where the weirdest stuff\u00a0on earth happens?\u00a0 And that’s why it takes so long to get there in the\u00a0seen-better-days Greyhound bus??\u00a0 (No, boys.\u00a0 I know the candy is still wrapped.\u00a0 And I agree, they DO\u00a0look\u00a0like a perfectly good Butterfinger and Baby Ruth bars, but if you found them\u00a0on the windowsill of this bus – DO NOT EAT THEM!!).<\/p>\n
There was some reprieve in the “Discovery Zone” section of the museum, but it was way too short-lived.\u00a0 And the whole time I had to keep an eagle\u00a0eye on the worker WEARING the hissing cockroach on her cardigan like a jaunty brooch.\u00a0 \u00a0And based on all the crazy stuff the boys\u00a0were touching and sniffing (??) in there, they’re all gonna get\u00a0rhinorrhea shortly.<\/p>\n
Also,\u00a0the kids are studying\u00a0Native Americans and the museum did have a nice little Native American exhibit going on, so we were able to\u00a0get a little “research” in while we were there.\u00a0 But that mostly consisted of everyone\u00a0running through the life-size Navajo hogan.\u00a0 And gawking at\u00a0all the stuff you can make with buffalo bones.<\/p>\n
At the end of the day I’m sure all the boys went home and told their mothers what a mean mother my son has.\u00a0 Well – let them see what kind of rave reviews they get when THEY star\u00a0as the chaperone in the next field trip play!<\/p>\n
At\u00a0least I didn’t fall asleep in the back of the bus like one of the other mothers.\u00a0 And that was only after she had broken the rules about buying the kids in her group something.\u00a0\u00a0She bought them all chocolate.\u00a0 And she bought herself a coffee from the cafeteria.\u00a0 Really?!\u00a0 I didn’t even know there was a gift shop or<\/em> a cafeteria.\u00a0 I was too busy being run ragged by monkeys to go SHOPPING!\u00a0\u00a0And SHE has the nerve to fall asleep??\u00a0 She’s for sure not gonna win any\u00a0Oscars for her\u00a0chaperone portrayal.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Hey!\u00a0 Turns out there IS something worse than dealing with the unemployment compensation agency.\u00a0 And that “something” is going on a 3rd grade field trip to the Museum of Nature and Science. It all started last\u00a0night\u00a0when my son explained\u00a0to me that they got to pick their own field trip groups.\u00a0 And that he tried really […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/382"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=382"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/382\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":741,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/382\/revisions\/741"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=382"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=382"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=382"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}