As I was driving Sissy to her softball practice, we were listening to a “That Chick Be CRAZY” segment on the radio.\u00a0 One caller was talking about that phrase: Don\u2019t step on a crack or you\u2019ll break your mother\u2019s back. \u00a0Well it turns out the caller DID break her mother’s back.\u00a0 By accidentally running her over with the family car!!!!<\/p>\n
Whaaaaaaa?? \u00a0That’s AWFUL.<\/em><\/p>\n But the story perked Sissy right up and made her start scrutinizing the car control panel as we’re driving along. \u00a0What exactly are you planning, Sweetie?<\/em><\/p>\n Her: Why does the speed thing go up to 140 miles per hour if you never GO 140 miles per hour?<\/p>\n Me: Good question. \u00a0But how do you know I DON’T go 140 miles per hour?!<\/p>\n Her: Mom!<\/p>\n Me: Ok, ok. \u00a0I don\u2019t necessarily go 140 miles per hour. \u00a0But it\u2019s there so that I have a good chance of outrunning the mafia if they’re ever after me.<\/p>\n Her: Mom! pause 2\u20263\u20264\u2026<\/em>Really??<\/p>\n Me: No, babe. \u00a0Because of the mafia’s actually after me, I\u2019m hosed.<\/p>\n Her: Why? \u00a0Is the mafia really fast?!<\/p>\n Me: It’s not that they’re necessarily fast. \u00a0It’s more that if I’m trying to outrun the mafia in a 12-year-old minivan, I’ve got WAY more problems than just car speed.<\/p>\n Her: Oh, ok.\u00a0 But I didn’t think it was fair that girl’s mom didn’t let her drive again until she was eighteen.<\/p>\n Me: The girl who broke her mother’s back?\u00a0 By running her over with a car?? \u00a0You think not letting her drive for a while after that was too harsh of a punishment?!?<\/p>\n Her: No.\u00a0 Of course not.\u00a0 It\u2019s just that the mom lived.\u00a0 It\u2019s not like she died or anything.\u00a0 But how do you even run someone over and they live?<\/p>\n [At this point, both of us are looking at the undercarriages of cars in front of us in traffic.]<\/p>\n Me: I don’t know. \u00a0‘Cause some of that stuff hangs pretty low. \u00a0But I guess if the person falls down lengthwise so they\u2019re in the center of all four wheels, so that the wheels don\u2019t run them over but go on either side of them, then maybe they just get a broken back.<\/p>\n Her: You\u2019re right, some of that stuff DOES hang pretty low. \u00a0[Sizing me up out of the corner of her eye.] \u00a0So you\u2019d probably have to be pretty skinny to live through that.<\/p>\n Me: Yep, probably pretty skinny. \u00a0So don’t ever run me over and we’ll be fine and you can drive at the normal age. \u00a0Ok?<\/p>\n Her: Ok.<\/p>\n Me: Oh, and don\u2019t ever get involved with the mafia.\u00a0 That\u2019s bad news.\u00a0 \u2018K?<\/p>\n Her: \u2018K.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" As I was driving Sissy to her softball practice, we were listening to a “That Chick Be CRAZY” segment on the radio.\u00a0 One caller was talking about that phrase: Don\u2019t step on a crack or you\u2019ll break your mother\u2019s back. \u00a0Well it turns out the caller DID break her mother’s back.\u00a0 By accidentally running her […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3675"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3675"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3675\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3682,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3675\/revisions\/3682"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3675"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3675"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3675"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}