{"id":3192,"date":"2014-05-05T10:04:18","date_gmt":"2014-05-05T16:04:18","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/?p=3192"},"modified":"2014-05-05T10:04:18","modified_gmt":"2014-05-05T16:04:18","slug":"pot-of-coffee-that-is","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/?p=3192","title":{"rendered":"Pot (of coffee, that is)"},"content":{"rendered":"

Hey.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>You think you\u2019re the only whiz-bang who\u2019s reloading the mini coffee pot in your hotel room using the cup YOU JUST DRANK OUT OF?!?<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\u2018Cause you\u2019re not.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

But enough about YOU.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Back to me.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

My coffee pot broke.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Not just broke, but plumed acrid, black smoke and snap, crackle, popped to death.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>It was a whole \u201cthrow it out the back door using oven mitts\u201d sort of thing.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

This has left me trying to survive my mornings with a mini coffee pot that I got from a hotel room somewhere and which apparently serves coffee to a grand total of one leprechaun.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Which means that I have to make three consecutive\u00a0pots-o\u2019-leprechaun-coffee to equal one new stay at home mom sized java injection.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

It\u2019s annoying.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Totally annoying.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>And I haven\u2019t had enough caffeine yet this morning so don\u2019t PISS ME OFF OR YOU\u2019LL BE SORRY!!<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span><\/em>I WILL FREAKIN\u2019 CUT YOU<\/em>.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Because I just want massive quantities of coffee\u2026VATS of coffee\u2026GET INTO MY BELLY, COFFEE<\/em>!!<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>And I don\u2019t want to be constantly\u00a0fiddling with a teeeeny tiiiiiny\u00a0coffeepot that makes me feel like I have a serious case of ham-hands.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

So what do to, what to do??<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>I had my first coffee pot for TWENTY YEARS!<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>This second pot didn\u2019t even last 18 months.<\/span>\u00a0 SONOFAB**CH!!\u00a0 <\/em><\/span>When I called the manufacturer with the “twenty years vs. less-than-18-months” storyline?<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Lucky day!<\/span>\u00a0 The 18-month-old coffee pot is\u00a0<\/span>still under warranty.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>So they\u2019re sending me another one.<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>The exact same make and model.\u00a0 FREE!<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Remember that part about \u201chouse almost caught on fire?!\u201d<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Yeah, remember that??<\/span>\u00a0 <\/span>Yes \u2013 more of that, please.\u00a0 But this time for\u00a0FREE!\u00a0\u00a0<\/em><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Hey.\u00a0 You think you\u2019re the only whiz-bang who\u2019s reloading the mini coffee pot in your hotel room using the cup YOU JUST DRANK OUT OF?!? \u2018Cause you\u2019re not.\u00a0 But enough about YOU.\u00a0 Back to me. My coffee pot broke.\u00a0 Not just broke, but plumed acrid, black smoke and snap, crackle, popped to death.\u00a0 It was […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[20,21,23,22,24,25],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3192"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3192"}],"version-history":[{"count":11,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3192\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3203,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3192\/revisions\/3203"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3192"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3192"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3192"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}