{"id":2839,"date":"2014-03-17T09:10:02","date_gmt":"2014-03-17T15:10:02","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/?p=2839"},"modified":"2014-03-17T12:07:42","modified_gmt":"2014-03-17T18:07:42","slug":"la-fheile-padraig","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/?p=2839","title":{"rendered":"L\u00e1 Fh\u00e9ile P\u00e1draig"},"content":{"rendered":"

Remember that \u201cthing\u201d from a few weeks ago?\u00a0 That \u201cthing\u201d my mother asked me not to tell anyone about??\u00a0 Well, since you\u2019re such a bunch of Nosy Parkers (say it the way my mother would say it with her New Hampshire accent.\u00a0 It\u2019s funnier that way.\u00a0 Nosy Paah-kuhs.\u00a0 See?\u00a0 Funny.)\u00a0 It\u2019s time for me to tell you about it.<\/span><\/p>\n

Be gosh and Begorah!\u00a0 My mother\u2019s birthday is today.\u00a0 Top O\u2019 The Mornin\u2019 to ya, Mum!\u00a0 And Happy St. Patrick\u2019s Day.\u00a0 (The title of this blog is “St. Patrick\u2019s Day” in GAELIC!\u00a0\u00a0 I know, it\u2019s a total wonder to me TOO why no one has hired me yet.)<\/span><\/p>\n

And for her birthday, my husband has suggested that we get my mother a chart.\u00a0 Of time zones.\u00a0 \u00a0So she will STOP calling us at 5:30 in the morning say maw-nin\u2019 as in: red sky in the maw-nin\u2019, sailors take wah-nin\u2019<\/em> with some cockamamie excuse that she got OUR timezone confused with Aunt Betty\u2019s timezone and thought we were only ONE hour behind Eastcoast time.\u00a0 Yeah, \u2018cause a call at 6:30 a.m. woulda been waaaay better.<\/em>\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

This birthday timezone chart would indicate to my mother that we are actually TWO hours behind her timezone in Virginia.\u00a0 And that we have ALWAYS been TWO hours behind her timezone in Virginia.\u00a0 Well, not always, but for the last FOURTEEN YEARS since we moved to Colorado.\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

That\u2019s it.\u00a0 That\u2019s all I have to say.\u00a0 Other than this:\u00a0 When my mother calls at 5:30 in the morning, and we don\u2019t answer, uhhhh, because the phone is all the way downstairs and\u2026it\u2019s 5:30 IN THE MORNING!!! <\/em>\u00a0she automatically assumes we\u2019re on the computer.\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

She will even leave that in her message, \u201cWell, it\u2019s 7:30 my time and I can\u2019t get ahold of you.\u00a0 You must be on the computer.\u201d (Compew-dah.\u00a0 Still funny.)<\/span><\/p>\n

Ok.\u00a0 At the dawn of computers, yes, that was a problem.\u00a0 You couldn\u2019t be on the computer AND on the phone.\u00a0 If you called someone who was on the computer, you\u2019d get a busy signal or go straight to voicemail.\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Now that we\u2019re in the future, however \u2013 and computers are connected through a complex network of tinfoil hats and airwaves (this explanation is skirting much\u00a0too close to math for my comfort so I\u2019ll stop) \u2013 computers no longer have anything to do with the phone.\u00a0 Or the phone line.\u00a0 And if \u201cpeople\u201d aren\u2019t answering the phone; it\u2019s not because they\u2019re on the compewdah.\u00a0 It\u2019s because you\u2019re calling at FIVE THIRTY IN THE MAWNIN’!\u00a0 \u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Glad we could clear that up.\u00a0\u00a0And\u00a0<\/span><\/span>all blogging aside, my mother is actually a super (soo-pah!) lady.\u00a0 Truly lovely.\u00a0 Kind and gentle and an example to all of a faith-filled life.\u00a0 Wife of 50+ years, mother of five, grandmother of six.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

But\u00a0she\u00a0has this habit!\u00a0 This\u00a0<\/span><\/span>habit of saying\u00a0everything five times.\u00a0 We think it’s because she has five kids.\u00a0 So if she says something five times, she’s done her duty.\u00a0 It doesn’t matter if she tells all five kids one time; or one kid five times.\u00a0 As long as it comes out of her mouth\u00a0five times, the deed is done.\u00a0 So,\u00a0following in that great tradition…Mom, for the fifth time\u00a0– Colorado is TWO HOURS BEHIND VIRGINIA.\u00a0 Are we done now?\u00a0 <\/span><\/p>\n

P.S.\u00a0 Your timezone chart is in the mail.\u00a0 Happy Birthday!\u00a0 And thanks for being such a good\u00a0spawt about all this.\u00a0 I love you.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Remember that \u201cthing\u201d from a few weeks ago?\u00a0 That \u201cthing\u201d my mother asked me not to tell anyone about??\u00a0 Well, since you\u2019re such a bunch of Nosy Parkers (say it the way my mother would say it with her New Hampshire accent.\u00a0 It\u2019s funnier that way.\u00a0 Nosy Paah-kuhs.\u00a0 See?\u00a0 Funny.)\u00a0 It\u2019s time for me to […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2839"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2839"}],"version-history":[{"count":13,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2839\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2852,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2839\/revisions\/2852"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2839"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2839"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2839"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}