{"id":2574,"date":"2014-02-06T14:12:06","date_gmt":"2014-02-06T21:12:06","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/?p=2574"},"modified":"2014-02-06T14:12:06","modified_gmt":"2014-02-06T21:12:06","slug":"3-fun-things-about-the-bitter-cold","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/?p=2574","title":{"rendered":"3 Fun Things About The Bitter Cold"},"content":{"rendered":"

It\u2019s been 11 degrees-below-zero here in Colorado for the last few days.\u00a0 That\u2019s Fahrenheit of course.\u00a0 And no, I won\u2019t even try to convert that to Celsius because we saw how well the Roman Numeral thing went earlier in the week.\u00a0 And everyone knows that Celsius is the Roman Numerals of Temperature.\u00a0 And please don\u2019t even get me started on the Kelvin scale.\u00a0 Because you know what that would result in?\u00a0 An Absolute Zero!\u00a0 (Hee hee hee \u2013 I\u2019m funny even in Kelvin land!\u00a0 And if you have no idea what I\u2019m talking about, you should look it up because me and the science-y guys are laughing our a$$e$ off right about now.)\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

But on the bright side, there have been some fun learning experiences amidst all this bitterly cold weather.\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

For one, everyone has been walking around like they\u2019re in a bad Heart music video from the 80\u2019s \u2026And the full moon that hangs over these dreams in the mist\u2026<\/em> but only from the ankles down.\u00a0 Because when the sun starts to warm up the icy ground, a weird six-inch fog boils up and floats across every open space.\u00a0 Cue\u00a0dream sequence:\u00a0 These dreams go on when I close my eyes\u2026Every second of the night I live another life\u2026These dreams that sleep when it’s COLD OUTSIDE\u2026Every moment I’m awake the further I’m away.<\/em>*<\/span><\/p>\n

The second fun thing I\u2019ve noticed in this cold weather are the sun dogs.\u00a0 While it\u2019s not unusual to see sun dogs in Colorado, typically they\u2019re just little patches of colored light waaaaay up in the sky.\u00a0 But the ones I\u2019ve seen lately look like parentheses-shaped rainbows around the sun.\u00a0 This atmospheric phenomenon is actually called an ice halo.\u00a0 (Or parhelion.\u00a0 And you know how I remember that?\u00a0 Because there\u2019s a song about it.\u00a0 From the 80\u2019s, natch.\u00a0 By Slade.\u00a0 It goes like this: Hey there, Par-hel-i-on, lying there in the sun.\u00a0 All things to everyone.\u00a0 Run, runaway.) Still your momma aren\u2019t I, science-y guys?!\u00a0 <\/em><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

And the THIRD fun thing about this weather?\u00a0 You get to discuss what happened to the Donner Party during similar weather 100+ years ago.\u00a0 I\u2019m not sure why it even came up (I may have had something to do with it, or maybe not, I\u2019m not admitting to anything here), but said conversation veered straight into a mention of cannibalism (nummy, num, num).<\/span><\/p>\n

Sonny \u2013 in a clearly horrified voice \u2013 joined the conversation with, \u201cYou mean they ATE people?\u00a0 Like\u2026what did they make?\u00a0 A STEW?!?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Hmmmm.\u00a0 Now why would STEW be the first dish that comes to mind when discussing cannibalism ?\u00a0 (Or ‘anthropophagy’ – this\u00a0one’s for you, science-y guys!)\u00a0\u00a0When I picture cannibals from the Donner Party, I don\u2019t picture them sitting around a cozy fire dressed in winter bonnets and wool shawls eating stew off tin plates, all civilized-like.\u00a0 I picture them\u00a0wild-eyed and\u00a0dressed in rags gnawing on a hairy-leg-still-wearing-a-sock.\u00a0 But STEW??\u00a0 That\u2019s just weird.\u00a0 Because really, if they had all the fixin\u2019s for stew, maybe they coulda just added a few more potatoes.\u00a0 And left the hairy legs where they belonged.<\/span><\/p>\n

Speaking of hairy legs, this\u00a0blog should actually have been titled:\u00a0FOUR Fun Things About The Bitter Cold with the\u00a0fourth fun thing being ‘no leg-shaving.’\u00a0 There’s no leg shaving in the\u00a0bitter cold.\u00a0 There’s no need because\u00a0no one sees your bare legs since you wear\u00a0leggings\u00a0morning, noon and night.\u00a0 Also hairy legs conserve body heat AND dissuade the cannibals.\u00a0 Hopefully.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

*”These Dreams\u201d by Heart, released in 1986 from their 1985 self-titled album.\u00a0 And??\u00a0 I\u2019m winning.\u00a0 Still winning.\u00a0 And?\u00a0 STILL WINNING in this \u201c80\u2019s song for every moment in life\u201d game that we play.\u00a0 Of which I am the queen.\u00a0 And the inventor.\u00a0 And?\u00a0 THE WINNER!<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It\u2019s been 11 degrees-below-zero here in Colorado for the last few days.\u00a0 That\u2019s Fahrenheit of course.\u00a0 And no, I won\u2019t even try to convert that to Celsius because we saw how well the Roman Numeral thing went earlier in the week.\u00a0 And everyone knows that Celsius is the Roman Numerals of Temperature.\u00a0 And please don\u2019t […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2574"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2574"}],"version-history":[{"count":12,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2574\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2586,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2574\/revisions\/2586"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2574"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2574"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2574"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}