{"id":2537,"date":"2014-01-30T14:56:55","date_gmt":"2014-01-30T21:56:55","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/?p=2537"},"modified":"2014-01-30T14:56:55","modified_gmt":"2014-01-30T21:56:55","slug":"pine-y-fresh-scent","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/?p=2537","title":{"rendered":"Pine-y Fresh Scent!"},"content":{"rendered":"

Ok.\u00a0 Before we go any further in this \u201cAirport Experience\u201d series of blogs, we need to address the stank elephant in the room\u2026<\/span><\/p>\n

For the love of all that\u2019s holy, WHAT is going on in the women\u2019s bathroom at the airport?!\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Because the faux pine scent that\u2019s being used to cover up whatever is happening in those bathrooms??\u00a0 It actually has the opposite effect and instead makes the whole experience a million times worse.<\/span><\/p>\n

It\u2019s like Bizarro World Narnia.\u00a0 You step through the door at the back of the wardrobe, and you suddenly find yourself in a deep, lush woodland of primeval evergreens.\u00a0 But something\u2019s\u2026off.\u00a0 Not.\u00a0 Quite.\u00a0 Right.\u00a0 Is the gas lantern burning at the edge of the woods?\u00a0 No.<\/em>\u00a0 Is it the snow that\u2019s softly falling??\u00a0 No.\u00a0 Not that either.\u00a0 It’s hard to describe.\u00a0 It’s more of a…[SNIFFFFF!]<\/em><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Accck!\u00a0 GAAAACCKKKKKKK!\u00a0 <\/em>What is that SMELL?!?\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Wait a second!\u00a0 This isn\u2019t a magical land!!\u00a0 This is an AIRPORT BATHROOM!!!\u00a0 And it smells like they just dragged an entire fake pine-forest-in-winter through here in order to dispose of the\u2026dead bodies.\u00a0 Not only did it NOT \u201cfreshen things up,\u201d but it tipped you off to the fact that something so horrific has happened in here, that it must never be mentioned.<\/span><\/p>\n

But I\u2019m breaking the silence!<\/span><\/p>\n

[chanting, with fist raised] No more pine-y fresh scent!\u00a0 No more pine-y fresh scent!\u00a0 No more pine-y fresh scent!<\/em><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

At a minimum, find a better scent!\u00a0 At a minimum, find a better scent!<\/em>\u00a0 [petering out because this no longer lends itself to chanting]<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Oh!\u00a0 And also?\u00a0 My Dear Sisters in Travel: whoever is making the bathroom SMELL\u00a0like a bathroom?\u00a0 Stop.\u00a0 Now.\u00a0 \u2018Cause when they say \u201ctake the show on the road,\u201d they didn\u2019t mean THAT show.\u00a0 Leave THAT show at home.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

P.S.\u00a0 Hi Hubby.\u00a0\u00a0Happy Birthday!\u00a0 Aren’t you glad we’ve spent the last TWENTY SIX of your birthdays together?\u00a0 Isn’t this fun??\u00a0 Aren’t you so happy you married someone so…insightful?\u00a0 I know, I know.\u00a0 I love you too.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Ok.\u00a0 Before we go any further in this \u201cAirport Experience\u201d series of blogs, we need to address the stank elephant in the room\u2026 For the love of all that\u2019s holy, WHAT is going on in the women\u2019s bathroom at the airport?!\u00a0 Because the faux pine scent that\u2019s being used to cover up whatever is happening […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2537"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2537"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2537\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2544,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2537\/revisions\/2544"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2537"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2537"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2537"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}