{"id":2434,"date":"2014-01-15T16:33:47","date_gmt":"2014-01-15T23:33:47","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/?p=2434"},"modified":"2014-01-15T16:33:47","modified_gmt":"2014-01-15T23:33:47","slug":"go-broncos","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/?p=2434","title":{"rendered":"Go Broncos!"},"content":{"rendered":"

I don\u2019t get the nation’s\u00a0obsession with the\u00a0Broncos.\u00a0 I mean, I get it (in a marketers dream-come-true sort of way), but I don\u2019t.<\/span><\/p>\n

Case in point: since the Bronco\u2019s football game on Sunday against the Chargers, the radio stations have been full of conversation over Peyton Manning\u2019s miked calls on the field.\u00a0 His \u201cOmaha, Omaha!\u201d play has prompted the mayor of Omaha, NE to see if he can get Manning to do some sort of plug for his city.\u00a0 Really, Omaha Mayor?\u00a0 Have at it and best of luck with that effort.\u00a0 I personally wouldn\u2019t take advice from football dudes about where to visit with my tourism dollars.\u00a0 And if I did, then the calls would have to start out, \u201cParis!\u00a0 Paris!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

And Manning\u2019s comments after the game about having a Bud Light have prompted a variety of artisan beer companies to send him their wares in the hopes of supplanting Budweiser in his heart and mind and subsequently getting a positive word out of him about his beer-of-choice at the NEXT press conference.\u00a0 \u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

[As a side note, the one thing about football I am on board with is the beer drinking afterwards.\u00a0 And before.\u00a0 And during.\u00a0 Especially during.\u00a0 Lots and lots during has the surprisingly positive effect of making football bearable.]<\/span><\/p>\n

Broncos-fever has gotten to the point where even the PRIEST is announcing God\u2019s football team preference from the pulpit on Sundays.\u00a0 Knowing the rules about the separation of Church and Football, he wouldn\u2019t come right out and say as much, but he did tell the following joke which I will repeat to you now.\u00a0 Because it was kinda funny…<\/span><\/p>\n

After living a long and full life, the coach of the Chargers (I can\u2019t remember his name – why would you think that I could?) dies and goes to Heaven.\u00a0 He meets God at the Pearly Gates and God shows him to a little cottage with a faded Chargers lightning bolt flag hanging off the mailbox.\u00a0 [Hi.\u00a0 It\u2019s me talking now.\u00a0 Anyone else think the Chargers lightning bolt looks like a banana from far away?\u00a0 They should NEVER have formed it into that semi-circle.\u00a0 Because lightning-in-the-wild is more jagged and not as tidy as that tame-half-moon-shaped lightning they got goin\u2019 on.\u00a0 Which\u00a0has the unintended consequence of making it look like everyone on the Chargers sidelines has bananas on their ski hats.\u00a0 Or are supporting some Middle Eastern country.\u00a0 That one\u00a0with the crescent moon and star on their flag.\u00a0 Or maybe it\u2019s just me??\u00a0 Naw!\u00a0 Couldn\u2019t be–not possible.<\/em>]\u00a0 \u00a0\u00a0God talks very highly of the cottage the coach will be in because the cottage is special.\u00a0 Not many people get their own cottage.\u00a0 But from the front window, the coach can see a huge mansion.\u00a0 The sidewalks and driveway are blue and orange and there\u2019s a horse-head shaped pool in the back yard.\u00a0 A huge Broncos flag is flying from the flagpole out in front of the house and there\u2019s a big Peyton Manning jersey on the front door.\u00a0 The Chargers\u2019 coach (nope, still don\u2019t remember his name) turns to God and says, \u201cWell, I\u2019m a Hall of Famer and have gone to Superbowls and have led a winning football team blah blah blah [Me again.\u00a0 The deets get a little fuzzy here because I don\u2019t even remember the guy\u2019s name, much less his football accomplishments<\/em>].\u00a0 So why do I<\/em> only get this little cottage and Peyton Manning gets a house like that?!?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

God turns to the coach and says, \u201cOh, ho-ho, Chargers\u2019 Coach.\u00a0 That\u2019s not Peyton Manning\u2019s house.\u00a0 That\u2019s MY house!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

See?\u00a0 Funny.\u00a0 Because we all know God doesn\u2019t really live in a house.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I don\u2019t get the nation’s\u00a0obsession with the\u00a0Broncos.\u00a0 I mean, I get it (in a marketers dream-come-true sort of way), but I don\u2019t. Case in point: since the Bronco\u2019s football game on Sunday against the Chargers, the radio stations have been full of conversation over Peyton Manning\u2019s miked calls on the field.\u00a0 His \u201cOmaha, Omaha!\u201d play […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2434"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2434"}],"version-history":[{"count":9,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2434\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2443,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2434\/revisions\/2443"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2434"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2434"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2434"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}