{"id":2426,"date":"2014-01-13T10:55:58","date_gmt":"2014-01-13T17:55:58","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/?p=2426"},"modified":"2014-01-13T10:55:58","modified_gmt":"2014-01-13T17:55:58","slug":"centurions","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/?p=2426","title":{"rendered":"Centurions"},"content":{"rendered":"

You ever have those people in your life?\u00a0 The ones who are CONVINCED\u00a0they know what they\u2019re talking about?\u00a0 But maybe don\u2019t\u2026quite?<\/span><\/p>\n

Yeah \u2013 me too.\u00a0 <\/span>Case in point: One time I was at a dinner party, and a man there was talking about how he had read a book about the secret to the longevity of the Centurions.<\/span><\/p>\n

Me:\u00a0 Uhhh\u2026Centurions?\u00a0 Like dudes in skirts who worked for Caesar?<\/span><\/p>\n

Him:\u00a0 No, no.\u00a0 CenTURions.\u00a0 Scientists had studied them and compiled a book on their findings of why they lived so long.<\/span><\/p>\n

Me:\u00a0 Sooo\u2026CENTURIONS??\u00a0 [It\u2019s at this point that I\u2019m pretty sure he\u2019s talking about people who are 100 years old.\u00a0 But I can\u2019t remember what they\u2019re called.\u00a0 All I can think of is that Colorado became a state when America was 100 years old and that\u2019s why it\u2019s called the Centennial State.\u00a0 But are PEOPLE called CENTENNIALS?\u00a0 That doesn\u2019t seem quite right either.\u00a0 But I KNOW they\u2019re not called Centurions.\u00a0 And unless Pythagoras took a break from his tedious theorems, there wasn\u2019t a scientist alive in 32 A.D. who studied the secret to the longevity of the Centurions.\u00a0 \u2018Cause if they had, they would have found that the secret was: 1) stay cool in your cute dress, 2) drive a swift chariot and 3) stick together in groups of 100.\u00a0 There’s just not enough\u00a0there to make an entire BOOK for people to talk about at dinner parties<\/em>.]\u00a0 So I say, \u201cActually, I\u2019m pretty sure Centurions were Roman Soldiers.\u00a0 Speaking of which…\u201d\u00a0 <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

And\u00a0I\u2019m off!\u00a0 Telling everyone about this\u00a0sweeping epic movie I\u2019d seen one time about the life of Jesus.\u00a0 And at the crucifixion scene, JOHN WAYNE was playing the role of the Centurion who stood by and watched Jesus take his final breath.\u00a0 All is quiet after darkness falls over the land and the shroud in the temple has ripped, and it\u2019s time for Mr. Wayne\u2019s voiceover, \u201cTruly this was the Son of God, Pilgrim.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

When we\u2019re all laughing at my rendition of John Wayne as a Roman CENTURION (he doesn’t really say “Pilgrim” in the movie\u00a0–\u00a0I added that part),\u00a0the man friend pipes up again with, \u201cOk, maybe they\u2019re not called Centurions.\u00a0 But they lived to be over 100.\u201d\u00a0 It\u2019s at this point my husband strolls over and says, \u201cOh, you mean like Centenarians?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

-End Scene-<\/span><\/p>\n

So where does this leave us when we\u2019re faced with those people?\u00a0 Whether it\u2019s an innocuous dinner party conversation, or something more important?\u00a0 I find it best to stick to my guns.\u00a0 All the while using a\u00a0little positive self-talk.\u00a0 But in a cartoon voice, \u201cI knows what I knows.\u00a0 And that\u2019s all that I knows\u2026guck, guck, guck!\u201d\u00a0 <\/span><\/p>\n

And if that fails?\u00a0 Call my husband.\u00a0 He\u2019ll know.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

You ever have those people in your life?\u00a0 The ones who are CONVINCED\u00a0they know what they\u2019re talking about?\u00a0 But maybe don\u2019t\u2026quite? Yeah \u2013 me too.\u00a0 Case in point: One time I was at a dinner party, and a man there was talking about how he had read a book about the secret to the longevity […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2426"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2426"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2426\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2432,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2426\/revisions\/2432"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2426"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2426"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2426"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}