Goin’ to the airport is always so enjoyable, don’t you agree?<\/p>\n
Before I leave home, I always make sure I have three cups of coffee and absolutely no food.\u00a0 I find this cranks up the fun level\u00a0exponentially.\u00a0 And is a great idea.<\/p>\n
Ok.\u00a0 Scratch that.\u00a0 It’s actually a bad, baaaaaad idea – which is exactly what I thought to myself halfway to the airport when I came to a full stop in construction.\u00a0\u00a0 I thought it again when I got to the entrance of east long-term parking only to have the entrance sign start flashing “FULL!”\u00a0\u00a0 Whaaaaat??\u00a0 What the frickety frickety frick frick?!?\u00a0\u00a0 I have to PEE, People!\u00a0 And I’m starting to get the shakes!!<\/em><\/p>\n Then I thought it a third time after I drove around WEST long-term parking for a HALF HOUR looking for the one spot left in the whole kingdom.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0I thought it a fourth and FINAL time as I ran for another FIFTEEN minutes from long-term parking to the terminal.\u00a0 Gang Way!\u00a0 Shakey McGee has to peeeeeeeee!!!<\/em><\/p>\n My thighs were quaking\u00a0and sweat was pouring down my back by the time I got to the…er…stall, but all’s well that ends well.\u00a0 Now, not another PEEp heh heh heh<\/em> out of me about that.<\/p>\n What I REALLY wanted to mention about the enjoyable airport experience are the lines.<\/p>\n First off, there was the security line with a dog walking up and down sniffing everyone’s bags.\u00a0 What’s he gonna find, exactly?\u00a0 Stowaways??\u00a0 Or in our heart-of-hearts are we all hoping he finds something more exciting?!\u00a0 I’m sure I’m not the only one surreptitiously looking around trying to peg the drug-runner-about-to-get-his-throat-ripped-out-by-a-beagle.\u00a0 My money was on the twenty something grunge queen who actually RECOILED from the beagle.\u00a0 But the beagle didn’t do anything.\u00a0 So no cause for alarm, I suppose.<\/p>\n In addition to the grunge queen, there were a couple of other gems in line with me.\u00a0 Behind me was a teen in tears whose nana was assuring her that it was an old phone anyway.\u00a0 And that losing it was just good practice for when she goes to Italy.\u00a0 (Huh?\u00a0 Good practice how?!\u00a0 For crying in ITALIAN??)<\/p>\n And in front of me?\u00a0 A frazzled mother with twin one year olds in a side-by-side stroller.\u00a0 The TSA agent informed her that her license had expired.\u00a0 The frazzled mom just started to laugh.\u00a0 And laugh.\u00a0 And LAUGH long after I had skirted past her.\u00a0 (I remember those days, Sweetheart.\u00a0 It does get better.\u00a0 In the meantime, check with the beagle.\u00a0 He may have something to help you out.)<\/p>\n And when you’re done with the security line, you get to stand in the Southwest boarding line.\u00a0 I find that this rounds out the good time.<\/p>\n B52 was my boarding position.\u00a0\u00a0 And all I have to say here is: Hop in my Chrysler.\u00a0 It’s as big as a whaaaaale!\u00a0 And it’s about to set saillllll…Love shack, baby, love shack!\u00a0 <\/em>(Love Shack<\/span> released September 1989 by the B-52’s<\/strong> on their album “Cosmic Thing”.)<\/p>\n And once again, I’ve proven that there IS an 80’s song for every moment in life – even for that moment when you’re standing in the Southwest boarding line with a bunch of fools\u00a0who\u00a0know absolutely NUTHIN’ about numerical order.\u00a0 You would think Southwest was asking them to line up by HEIGHT or birth-month\u00a0for the love.\u00a0 Sign says, ‘Stay away, FOOLS’\u00a0‘Cause love rules at the LO-uh-uh-VE SHACK!…<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Goin’ to the airport is always so enjoyable, don’t you agree? Before I leave home, I always make sure I have three cups of coffee and absolutely no food.\u00a0 I find this cranks up the fun level\u00a0exponentially.\u00a0 And is a great idea. Ok.\u00a0 Scratch that.\u00a0 It’s actually a bad, baaaaaad idea – which is exactly […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2022"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2022"}],"version-history":[{"count":12,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2022\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2034,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2022\/revisions\/2034"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2022"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2022"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2022"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}