{"id":1644,"date":"2013-07-25T21:04:22","date_gmt":"2013-07-26T03:04:22","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/?p=1644"},"modified":"2013-07-25T21:04:22","modified_gmt":"2013-07-26T03:04:22","slug":"how-to-become-a-jedi-knight","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/?p=1644","title":{"rendered":"How to become a Jedi Knight"},"content":{"rendered":"

I was cleaning out the car today…and found a Star Wars Mad Libs book!\u00a0 Methinks we’ve got a blog\u00a0THEME going here this week.\u00a0 Tomorrow perhaps I’ll share with you the little known\u00a0lyrics to the Star Wars song (hint:\u00a0most people think the song is only instrumental – except for my\u00a0husband and son, they know different).<\/p>\n

Until then, I will leave you with the following information on…<\/p>\n

How to become a Jedi Knight<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

[The following is so funny you\u00a0might\u00a0forget to laugh.\u00a0 Just\u00a0like I did.\u00a0 Oh.\u00a0 And for the record?\u00a0 It\u00a0<\/em>was completed\u00a0by 9 and 10 year olds in case you couldn’t tell.<\/em>]<\/p>\n

Want to be\u00a0a Jedi POOP<\/span>?\u00a0 Follow these STINKY<\/span> steps:<\/strong><\/p>\n

    \n
  1. Find a Jedi Master: In order to become a POOPY<\/span> Jedi, a young Padawan, or Jedi apprentice, needs to learn from someone who has FAST<\/span> mastered his or her training.\u00a0 Perhaps Master TEDDY [<\/span><\/strong>the family dog<\/em><\/span>]<\/span>\u00a0is available.\u00a0 <\/strong><\/li>\n
  2. Study the ways of the Force: It takes a lot of SMELLY<\/span> patience and belief in the TOOTS<\/span> around you, but a Padawan must understand the Force before he or she can really practice the ways of the Jedi BELLYBUTTON<\/span>.<\/strong><\/li>\n
  3. Make your own light-BUTTCRACK<\/span>: Find special BUTT CHEEKS<\/span> to place in your lightsaber’s MOLE<\/span>.\u00a0 Then, commune with the Force to make it PEE<\/span>.<\/strong><\/li>\n
  4. Listen SLOWLY<\/span>: Finally, and most HIGHLY<\/span>, do as the older and wiser Jedi BOOGERS<\/span> tell you — even if they want you to COOK<\/span> QUICKLY<\/span>!<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    I was cleaning out the car today…and found a Star Wars Mad Libs book!\u00a0 Methinks we’ve got a blog\u00a0THEME going here this week.\u00a0 Tomorrow perhaps I’ll share with you the little known\u00a0lyrics to the Star Wars song (hint:\u00a0most people think the song is only instrumental – except for my\u00a0husband and son, they know different). Until […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1644"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1644"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1644\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1648,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1644\/revisions\/1648"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1644"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1644"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1644"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}