What.\u00a0 The.\u00a0 Hell?!\u00a0\u00a0 What the hell just happened?!<\/p>\n
Everyone else called\u00a0it our first\u00a0swim meet.\u00a0 I call\u00a0it “total chaos.”\u00a0\u00a0It was kindof like a cubscout meeting\u00a0‘cept all the kids were\u00a0wearing swimsuits instead of blue shirts and kerchiefs.<\/p>\n
And\u00a0apparently there was a dress code for the mothers too – but I didn’t get the memo.\u00a0\u00a0Most moms were dressed like they were gonna go play tennis with the queen then stay for her\u00a0garden party afterwards.<\/p>\n
Me?\u00a0 I was wearing faded,\u00a0stretchy sweatshorts & a jean jacket.\u00a0 I rocked a tank top w\/floral embellishments though.\u00a0 In all honesty, I HAD planned\u00a0to wear something slightly cuter (AND\u00a0curl my hair) but then the dog built Puketown\u00a0on the carpet at the top of the stairs.\u00a0 Built Puketown\u00a0INTO and AROUND\u00a0the cow hoof he had been chewing on.\u00a0 Which was convenient in an odd way because then I was able to use the hollow hoof to BAIL OUT the majority of Puketown!\u00a0\u00a0 Papertowels were used for what was left post-bail-out.\u00a0\u00a0Gaack!\u00a0 GAAAAAAACCCKKKKKK!!!<\/p>\n
So the outfit went to heck-in-a-hand-basket & I just had to grab whatever was on the floor of my room so that we could\u00a0fly out of the house to make the 6:45 am report-in deadline.\u00a0 As the flying was occurring out the door,\u00a0I caught a glimpse of the dog shredding the paper towels I had just used to clean Puketown.\u00a0 Awesome.\u00a0\u00a0Totally awesome.<\/p>\n
This\u00a0stellar start to the day meant that\u00a0I was REALLY\u00a0focused on\u00a0wondering what the dog was doing NOW.\u00a0 And NOW.\u00a0 And even NOW.\u00a0 So I gotta admit\u00a0I\u00a0wasn’t really paying too\u00a0much attention to the meet.\u00a0\u00a0Other than to note that there was a\u00a0LOT of eating.\u00a0 I’m wondering how much the breakfast buffet with sprinkle pancakes is gonna cost us?!?<\/p>\n
And there was a\u00a0LOT of yelling too.\u00a0 Which I may have participated in.\u00a0\u00a0But ONLY because I thought Sonny was missing\u00a0and his race was up next.\u00a0 So I went\u00a0running into the boys’ bathroom YELLING his name.\u00a0 Zero.\u00a0\u00a0I went\u00a0up to\u00a0the breakfast buffet YELLING his name.\u00a0\u00a0 Zilch.\u00a0\u00a0I even had the announcer ANNOUNCE\u00a0his name.\u00a0 Zip.<\/p>\n
Turns out he was in “heating” the whole time.\u00a0 “Heating” is\u00a0where you wait like a good little swimmer\u00a0until it’s your turn for the race.\u00a0 I checked there but, Heck!\u00a0 Don’t blame me!!\u00a0\u00a0They ALL look alike with their matching swimsuits and caps and goggles.\u00a0 How was I supposed to know he was playing the role of the good little swimmer today??!<\/p>\n
Anywhooooo…I didn’t want to let this opportunity sliiiide\u00a0(me funny.\u00a0 me make funny pun about slippery-nesss in swim\u00a0blog.\u00a0 me very, very funny) to make a few other insightful\u00a0observations:<\/p>\n
Suffice to say – while this is the first\u00a0“swimteam summer” of\u00a0our lives, it may be the last.\u00a0\u00a0If I had a job, I’d have to take the day off for this nonsense.\u00a0 Or at least the morning.\u00a0 And when I finally get WORK to take time off FROM?!\u00a0 I’m pretty sure it wouldn’t\u00a0be for this!\u00a0 Yep.\u00a0 Pretty sure.<\/p>\n
But I don’t have a job.\u00a0 That’s why we’re doing sink-or-swimteam this summer.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
What.\u00a0 The.\u00a0 Hell?!\u00a0\u00a0 What the hell just happened?! Everyone else called\u00a0it our first\u00a0swim meet.\u00a0 I call\u00a0it “total chaos.”\u00a0\u00a0It was kindof like a cubscout meeting\u00a0‘cept all the kids were\u00a0wearing swimsuits instead of blue shirts and kerchiefs. And\u00a0apparently there was a dress code for the mothers too – but I didn’t get the memo.\u00a0\u00a0Most moms were dressed […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1437"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1437"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1437\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1443,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1437\/revisions\/1443"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1437"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1437"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1437"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}