{"id":1391,"date":"2013-05-30T10:16:43","date_gmt":"2013-05-30T16:16:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/?p=1391"},"modified":"2013-05-30T10:16:43","modified_gmt":"2013-05-30T16:16:43","slug":"catholic-boys","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/?p=1391","title":{"rendered":"Catholic Boys"},"content":{"rendered":"
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“Come out, Virginia.\u00a0 Don’t let me wait.\u00a0 You Cath-o-lic girls start much too late.<\/em>”<\/p>\n

(I’ll award bonus points if you can name the artist and song title that go with these lyrics…as long as you don’t breathe a word to anyone about the song being from the late 70’s instead of the early 80’s; ’cause that would ruin it for EVERYONE if you did that.\u00a0 So don’t.)<\/p>\n

Anywhoooo…how come no one ever writes songs about Catholic BOYS?!?\u00a0 Puzzling, no?<\/p>\n

Well, songs or not, I’m here to put in a good word for the Catholic boys.\u00a0 My son being one.\u00a0 [And I realize that this particular blog post has quite possibly devolved into only stuff I find funny, but I’m gonna go there anyway.]<\/p>\n

Here is\u00a0what a Catholic school boy does with his left-over, end-of-year school supplies.\u00a0 (see pic)<\/p>\n

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Please note how the bottom of the ruler has been sharpened on the curb.\u00a0 But at least it’s being put to good use as a cross rather than a prison yard shiv.\u00a0 Hopefully we’ll never go “there”…but we’re ready with our mad skilllzz in case we do.<\/p>\n

Also, if it hasn’t been mentioned before, I just wanted to mention now that\u00a0this is the last week of school.\u00a0 And as a special treat, for the last week of school, my son’s class gets to rearrange their desks to sit with a friend or two.\u00a0 They also get to name this new group they’ve created.\u00a0 My son and his friends named their group “The Gay Nerds.”<\/p>\n

ME:\u00a0 (out loud) “Oh. My. Gawd!\u00a0 What??\u00a0 WHAT?!??!\u00a0 WHERE DID YOU GET THAT NAME??\u00a0 Did the teacher APPROVE this??\u00a0 She couldn’t POSSIBLY have APPROVED THIS!!!”<\/p>\n

(and in my head) Is this how I find out?\u00a0 IS THIS HOW I FIND OUT??\u00a0 Is this THE TALK???\u00a0 ARE WE HAVING TALK RIGHT NOW??!?!\u00a0 Wait.\u00a0 WHAT talk are we having??\u00a0 What talk is this that we’re having??\u00a0 I think we’re having a talk about something but I’m not sure what talk we’re having.\u00a0 No.\u00a0 He’s in THIRD GRADE!\u00a0 We’re not having a talk about ANYTHING!<\/em><\/p>\n

SONNY:\u00a0 “Mom, you’re over-reacting.\u00a0 We named ourselves that.\u00a0 So it’s ok.\u00a0 No one called us that.\u00a0 We chose that.”<\/p>\n

ME:\u00a0 “But Sweetie, DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS?!?”<\/p>\n

SONNY:\u00a0 “We like games.”<\/p>\n

ME:\u00a0 “Wait.\u00a0 What?!\u00a0 What’s the name of your group again??”<\/p>\n

SONNY:\u00a0 “I told you already.\u00a0 The GAME Nerds.”<\/p>\n

Oh.\u00a0 Ok.\u00a0 Phew!\u00a0 Carry on.<\/p>\n

But now they’ve added more boys to their group and this bigger group voted to change their name.\u00a0 They’re now calling themselves the “Knights of Christ.”\u00a0 And they carry around homemade-shiv-ruler-crosses in the belt buckle loops of their shorts.\u00a0 Not sure what they’re doing with those.\u00a0 Patrolling the prison yard…er…playground for ne’er-do-wells in a Colorado Catholic school boy version of the New York City Subway’s Guardian Angels?!?<\/p>\n

Wait!\u00a0 I just got clarification from the other room.\u00a0 Turns out it’s NOT a cross.\u00a0 It’s a SWORD.\u00a0 Ugh.\u00a0 I don’t think SWORDS are allowed at school!!!<\/p>\n

Now, to understand my son a bit better and not think he’s some super-violent kid (SWORDS?!?\u00a0 Oh, Lord.)\u00a0you need to know that this is\u00a0the same boy who lets the swim coach call him Cameron (sooooo not his name) because he doesn’t want to hurt the coach’s feelings by correcting him.\u00a0 Instead, he’s just started answering to the name Cameron and taking all swim instruction directed thereto.<\/p>\n

So\u00a0even though WE\u00a0know your heart’s in the right place, my Gay Nerd Knight of Christ –\u00a0please, please, please don’t inadvertently get kicked out for bringing a deadly weapon to school.\u00a0 We only have one more day to go!\u00a0 Hang in there.<\/p>\n

Also?\u00a0 Mystery\u00a0solved.\u00a0\u00a0THIS is why there are no songs about Catholic Boys!!!<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

“Come out, Virginia.\u00a0 Don’t let me wait.\u00a0 You Cath-o-lic girls start much too late.” (I’ll award bonus points if you can name the artist and song title that go with these lyrics…as long as you don’t breathe a word to anyone about the song being from the late 70’s instead of the early 80’s; ’cause […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1391"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1391"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1391\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1399,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1391\/revisions\/1399"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1391"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1391"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1391"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}