Lately the new dog, Teddy, has been buckin’ the system and trying to get OUT of his kennel as we’re trying to put\u00a0him in it!<\/p>\n
So, being the kind and loving mother I am (why are you snickering?\u00a0 Stop it.\u00a0 I said STOP.) I developed a work-around.\u00a0 I went to Target and got a baby gate.\u00a0 I put the dog’s kennel and water\/food dishes in the laundry room and the next time I left, I made him go in his kennel\u00a0IN the laundry room, but I didn’t shut the kennel\u00a0door.\u00a0 Instead I just put up the baby gate at the mouth of the laundry room and let him spread out a bit while I was gone.\u00a0 See?\u00a0 Problem solved.\u00a0 In a\u00a0thoughtful and creative way. (STOP SNICKERING!\u00a0 Or I will bean you!\u00a0\u00a0Great.\u00a0 Now you’re making me lose my loving mojo.)<\/p>\n
Except when I got back home…Teddy was on the OTHER side of the baby gate; which was still totally secure and intact.\u00a0 The dog is too small to jump over the gate (I’m pretty sure he is, at least).\u00a0 And he couldn’t have climbed over (again, I’m pretty sure, at least).\u00a0 So how did he get over??<\/p>\n
My husband thinks Teddy\u00a0may not have\u00a0even BEEN in the laundry room when I secured the gate.\u00a0 (Thanks, Hon.\u00a0 That makes me seem totally\u00a0sane and competent.)<\/p>\n
My son thinks Teddy used a teleporter.\u00a0 Now THIS is a theory I can get behind.<\/p>\n
Me: “Uh – if you had the use of a teleporter…wouldn’t you teleport to someplace like PARIS?\u00a0 Instead of into the kitchen??”<\/p>\n
Sonny: “Well, maybe it’s just a house teleporter.\u00a0 So it only works in the house.”<\/p>\n
Me: “Hmmmm.\u00a0 Maybe.\u00a0 It just seems like a waste of teleportation capabilities.”<\/p>\n
[Don’t you too want to live in his world?\u00a0 This is the world where the possibility exists that dogs can access teleporters from the laundry room.\u00a0 I practically LIVE in the laundry myself, and have NEVER noticed a teleporter.\u00a0 But you know who WOULD notice a teleporter?\u00a0 The dopey dog.\u00a0 And\u00a0hey!\u00a0 If the boy is\u00a0living in a world where the DOG uses a teleporter he found in the LAUNDRY ROOM to teleport into the KITCHEN…then I’m totally gonna live in that world\u00a0too.\u00a0 And?\u00a0 I’m gonna find\u00a0the teleporter,\u00a0jerry-rig it, and\u00a0teleport\u00a0into a kitchen IN PARIS!]<\/p>\n
Allons-y!! (that means “Let’s Go!” in French.\u00a0 And yes, it’s a total mystery why no one has hired me yet.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Lately the new dog, Teddy, has been buckin’ the system and trying to get OUT of his kennel as we’re trying to put\u00a0him in it! So, being the kind and loving mother I am (why are you snickering?\u00a0 Stop it.\u00a0 I said STOP.) I developed a work-around.\u00a0 I went to Target and got a baby […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1347"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1347"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1347\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1351,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1347\/revisions\/1351"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1347"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1347"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newstayathomemom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1347"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}