Downton Abbey

Ok, that religious blog thing didn’t work out so well for me. So that’s done.

Going secular again…

I resist watching Downton Abbey the way I resist Pinterest. I’m not gettin’ involved.  I’m not even gonna get involved.  Because if I do, there will be no hope for me.  I’ll be a goner.  Time suck – – – activate!

So I resist. Resistance is futile, Earthling.

Until this past Sunday when I was running on the treadmill, trying to avoid reading a book for ‘hood book club by flipping through t.v. channels when I came across a PBS special about Downton Abbey. I stopped there because it was about time I knew what everyone was talking about.  I was sick of hearing things like, “YOU don’t watch Downton Abbey?!,” all shock and awe.  Or, “I can’t believe you don’t watch Downton Abbey; I figured you for a Downton Abbey watcher.”

Really? How are people figuring me for something like this?  Do I wear a cloche hat overtop my Marcel waves and this is what gives me away as a Downton Abbey watcher?! And are we still saying ‘figured you for’ in casual conversation?!  Isn’t it kindof like saying, “Them there vittles my misses made be real fine.”  Nope, no one’s saying stuff like that anymore.

Anyway, I watched the rest of this particular episode and it was AMAZING! There was a wedding, the butler with a tremor retires in pride, champagne was passed around at midnight on New Year’s Eve and a baby was born in Lady Elaine Everley’s bed.  It reminded me of General Hospital back in the day before Anna Devane fell in love with the Star Man and the whole thing jumped the shark.

GadZOOKS! Downton Abbey is GORGEOUS!  Why are we not all living in that place?  And doing good works at that hospital with what’shername from Racing with the Moon?  And wearing those completely fabulous dresses…and hats…and jewelry…and shoes…and talking like THAT?!?  Even the servants got it goin’ ON below-stairs with their accents and drop waist dresses.  Practically the whole cast of those Marigold Hotel movies is involved somehow too.

I am. IN! I am sooooo in!!!!  Count me in!  COUNT ME IN!!!!  Y’all figured right the whole time.  I’m a Downton Abbey watcher.  Now!  No, now!  NOW!!!

The scene I’m watching ends on a close-up of that man with the cane kissing his wife over the top of their newborn’s head. Fade to external shot of the Abbey with snow falling softly into the night.

Gah, AWESOME!  Num, num, num.  I could eat you Downton Abbey.  Get in my belly!

Suddenly we’re back in the loud PBS studio and the announcer says, “And that’s the last episode of Downton Abbey. We’re sad to see it go.”

Whaaaaa?! Wait, WHAAAAAA?!??  What the WHAT?  That’s the END?  THE END??!  But I just joined.  I’m IN.  How can it be OUT when I’m finally IN?!

Figures.

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